That Woman Pastor

Celebrating the Season!

Thu, 29 Dec 2011 01:48:00 GMT

A lot of Church Planters and Senior Pastors often write about how horrifically hard this type of ministry can be. And I agree, it is often really, really hard. But there is one thing you rarely here leaders talk about and that's the joy, joy, joy that is also found in doing this ministry!

Why Joy? Because in my opinion, there is no more satisfying work in all the world than is the work of serving our Holy Lord! Ohhhh, soo very satisfying. Words can not come close to describing the overwhelming, pure joy I feel at times.

When I see someone find Christ for the first time! (And I see their joy!)

When I see someone have an aha moment with the Lord that leads to much growth!

When I see a husband and wife forgive each other for horrific things!

When I see people unselfishly reaching out to others in the name of Jesus!

When I know God has used me to help someone!

When I see evidence of the Living God time after time in the lives of others!

When I get to walk on water with jesus!

When I see the Lord's Kingdom COME!

When I hear children talk about Jesus!

When I see people fall in love with the Church!

When I see people learning to love serving the LORD!

When I see people using their gifts to serve the LORD for the first time!

When I see people tithing through faith!

When I know God has used me (even a tiny bit) to make any of these things happen in the lives of others! It's ohhh sooo satisfying! To HIM be all the glory forever and ever! Amen!

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Church Planters & Pastors: Success or Failures?

Tue, 25 Oct 2011 14:43:00 GMT

I woke up this morning thinking about Shaun King and his wife.

I'm sure he was much on my mind because right before I went to bed last night, I read THIS (his story about his recent resigning as the pastor of Courageous Church in Atlanta, GA).

I have been reading Shaun's blog for over 3 years now. He planted Courageous Church in Atlanta in January of 2009. They saw very rapid growth and I was quite shocked to hear about the recent turn of events.

And I was also saddened to read Rai King (Shaun's wife)'s blog on her perspective. My heart goes out to this family and to this church.

There is no judgment on my part towards Shaun & Rai, only empathy. In the past nine years of being the senior pastor of the church I planted, I'm sure my husband and I have felt all of the raw emotions they have experienced at one time or another. Although we've not experienced the rapid growth that they did, the emotions and frustrations are not much different, no matter what size the church.

I am sure Shaun did the right thing for his family by resigning, but I'm still very sorry to hear that he did because it is a huge loss for the Kingdom of God in Atlanta. I can't help wonder if a big reason for his frustration doesn't have everything to do with expectations. I know much of my frustration early on had a lot to do with the fact that I entered into church planting with some incorrect expectations.

And sadly, I think this is the reason too many church planters throw in the towel way too soon. Although Shaun's case is much different than most I'm guessing. He actually did have rapid growth and the kind of results some church planters only dream about. The world would say he was extremely 'successful.' But Shaun saw the truth: very, very few true followers of Jesus Christ!

From the outside, the church looked like a roaring success! Attendance was increasing rapidly. The giving had never been higher. Some people would say, WOW, look how God is blessing that pastor's ministry! But again, Shaun saw the truth. People wanted to talk about serving God and changing the world, but very few were willing to step up and actually do it. He saw a church full of 'pew' sitters and very, very few real disciples.

I can't imagine any pastor in America not feeling his frustration! One of the people who had a huge impact on my ministry early on was Walt Kallestad. Walt is an ELCA Lutheran pastor who built a huge megachurch of over 12,000 people. I attended a conference led by Walt over 20 years ago that was life changing for me. I met and talked to him and his wife and even exchanged a few letters with him. Walt has the most amazing, Christ-filled heart of anyone I've ever met. His heart and vision for God has been a tremendous inspiration to me for many years.

And yet, I was very shocked not long ago to hear him publicly confess that the mega-church he is leading is a complete failure! Seriously? You built a church of over 12,000 people and you consider that a failure? YES he does!

Read his quote here:

"We were entertaining people as a substitute for leading them into the presence of God. I fell on my face before God and prayed, "God, I am so sorry for what I've done."
(Walt Kallestad, read more here.)

Walt said he realized he had produced a huge church full of 'consumers' instead of 'disciples.' Wow, what a confession! I see huge similarities between Shaun King and Walt Kallestad. And I can't help but think of Francis Chan being similar as well. Even though I've never heard Francis say things exactly like that, it's not hard to read between the lines of much of what he has said. I really believe he stepped down from his 'mega-church' for the same reasons.

I hear God speaking to me through all of these men. I remember Dan Southerland once talking about the mega-church that he and his leadership team once grew in Florida. They saw rapid growth and he said that he and his lead team were all 'high-fiving' each other on one of their first leadership retreats. But he said, then it suddenly hit them. They realized that most all of their growth was transferred growth from other churches. They weren't growing the Kingdom of God, they were simply swapping sheep.

And sadly, that is the reason some churches do see 'rapid' growth. People are fickle and always have been. Many are looking to jump on the next band wagon of what appears to be 'the winning' church. Often, it's a church that is all about having all the bells and whistles! Its churches whose main attraction is all about entertainment and putting on a dog & pony show. One can't help but wonder, is there any real discipleship happening there?

At BHCC, I am comforted and incredibly encouraged to see so many lives being transformed and disciples growing in their faith! Our church is reaching people very far from God. This past summer, we baptized 17 adults! We currently have 2 pastor apprentices in training; one of them found Christ and was baptized at our church. That's amazing!!!

And interestingly, we have very few "mature Christians" come to our church. And sadly, when they do, I often feel so judged by them. They judge us on surface value things like how many butts are in seats that day or how organized and polished they feel our children's ministry is or isn't and so forth. It boggles my mind and yet, I have to confess that I've allowed the judgment of outsiders weigh me down and become a deep discouragement to me at times. I feel the judgments and grieve over the rejections. Some of the worst judgments I've experienced is from other pastors in my area. So sad!!!

But I hear God speaking incredibly encouraging things to me and I'm not going to fall into Satan's trap anymore! And I am praying that this blog will be a HUGE encouragement to other church planters and pastors who do not pastor a 'mega-church.' Don't let the ways and viewpoint of the world cloud your vision friend! Things are not always what they may seem. Smaller churches may be making 100 times more disciples than big churches!

Thank God for incredible leaders like Shaun King, Walt Kallestad and Dan Southerland who speak the truth and are not afraid to confess their own failures so we can all learn along with them!

Ask yourself this question future church planter, "Are you willing to be a failure in the eyes of the world in order to be a success in the eyes of God?"

Peace in Christ alone!

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Church Plant and Church Growth / Statistics and Emotions?

Fri, 14 Oct 2011 13:26:00 GMT

They say a leader's first job is to define reality. That's what I've been trying hard to do with the present status of our church recently. Asking the hard questions: How are we doing? Where exactly are we? Are we healthy? Are we growing? What's working? What's not working? What's the next step?

Of course, there is a ton of prayer that is wrapped around every part of this process.

But then there is this challenging quest to find tangibles that define the spiritual. This is where it gets difficult because so much of what we do is impossible to measure in tangible ways. Some things are 'immeasurable' and other things are impossible to place a value around.

But we need to do the best we can with what we have so we try to use what we know.

The first question I want to answer is: Is BHCC church growing? And if so, at what rate? Fortunately, there are finally some reliable studies and resources out there to draw from. These things were not there when we first planted this church. Here's the results of my examination and my conclusions. I will also share some great statistics with you.

Our church has grown by around 12% from last year, and by 44% since we relaunched it in 2007 (4 years). That's pretty amazing growth! Especially since every church looses around 10% of their congregation a year, and in that department, we're very average!

So not only does the church have to continually replace the 10%, we must seek to grow on top of that.

Our giving has stayed about the same since last year, but since 2007, it has grown by 74% which is phenomenal! (We do need more growth though!)

We have grown by almost 100 people since 2007, that's an average growth of about 25 people a year. Most churches only retain 10% of their visitors, on average, we retain 15-20% of our visitors. In other words, we're doing a really good job of welcoming people and helping them get connected in our church. (At least compared to average!)

Most churches have an average of around 3% of their Sunday attendance as first time visitors. BHCC averages around 6%! This means we're doing 'above average' in attracting first time visitors. Yeah God!

So this helps answers questions like, how are we doing in attracting new people? How are we doing at welcoming new people into our family? Do we have a back door problem? Are too many people not staying long term?

In many areas, we're doing average or above average! On paper, our statistics fit the profile of a rapidly growing church. We've baptized over 70 people since the church began, and baptized 17 just this past summer!

So what's the problem? It feels like we are growing sooo slow to me. I feel frustrated and 'anxious' to see this church growing at a greater, exponential kind of rate. I look at the numbers and think, wow, we're doing really well! And the fact that we are in one of the absolute, most difficult places in the country to grow a church, AND, we have a female senior pastor, we're doing something very phenomenal!

This is pioneering work for women. I can't find hardly ANY non-denominational, female founding / senior pastors anywhere in this country! Our area is very anti-women pastors overall. And I have to keep reminding myself of this fact of life!

I see no churches on the whole east side of Rochester that are having more growth than us. In fact, most of the churches all around us are either status quo or dying. Yes, a few are growing, but those that are, have been growing slow & steady like us. (Well, it's not that slow according to statistics but it feels that way to me at times.)

My calling feels like a double-edge sword to me at times. I am so completely driven to reach lost people for Christ and to see God's church GROW! I think about it 24/7. I lay awake at night praying for how I can better serve Christ in this way. I cry over lost people. My heart continually grieves and is so burdened for lost souls! But this obsession of mine drives me crazy at times. :-) Yes, I praise God abundantly over each soul we see get saved, but I keep seeing all the lost and drifting souls that are on the highway to hell and being an average church is so not good enough! Not when so many souls are at stake!

Sometimes I wonder if my frustration comes partly (or wholly) from a selfish place. I know my flesh is selfish and ambitious and wants to succeed and be seen as successful. I continually pray about such motives and ask God to remove them. (Although, sometimes I wonder if it is not just Satan accusing me of such things?)

Oh well, at the end of the day, I pray that I am able to NOT make it all about me and instead keep it all about Christ. I so want to give Him EVERYTHING I have in me! I want to give Him my absolute best because that's what He deserves!

I'd love to hear from some other church planters on how their churches are doing and how they deal with all the emotions that connect too how our churches are doing. :-) Please leave a post!!!

Peace in Christ Alone!

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Best and Worst?

Thu, 22 Sep 2011 12:15:00 GMT

Pastors and Unity???

Sun, 14 Aug 2011 12:16:00 GMT

Last week I attended the Global Leadership Summit satelite version. There was a large gathering of other local senior pastors and leaders at this event. Every year I feel very torn about whether or not to attend and some years I do and some years, I don't!

Conferences almost always leave me with all kinds of conflicting feelings, both good and bad, but this particular one always leaves me with many strong, negative emotions to process.

It has everything to do with the fact that it is a gathering of local pastors, and I know many of them and have for many years. Here we are being incredibly inspired by the conference speakers to be Christ-like, and to be humble and vulnerable and forgiving and peace makers; and then we go on a break and I run into pastors I know who won't talk to me, won't say hello and even turn the other way when they see me coming.

If you don't me, you might think, oh wow, what kind of crazy person is this that gets that kind of response from other pastors? Well, first of all, I am that woman pastor, remember?

So you have the first group of 'guys' who don't believe women should be pastors and apparently they think that means they should shun us and treat us disrespectfully, or greater still, just totally ignore us! How mature in Christ is that? Fortunately, this group of guys is shrinking but they're still plenty of them out there.

And the next group of guys are the ones I have had history with. Some of them, I have served the Lord with, prayed with, baptized others with, taken communion with, supported, loved, humbled and made myself vulnerable before. And apparently there are a miriad of unique reasons that they choose to walk by me, ignore me or barely nod their head at me. Sad, so sad! I am so disappointed in them as pastors and leaders. I am disappointed in all the mugging that always goes on at these local gatherings of leaders.

The pastors of the big churches only sit and talk with other pastors of big churches. Are you serious? The first question one is asked when first meeting another pastor is not, "How many lives you seeing changed at your church?" but instead, it is always, "How many people ya got?"

It grieves my heart and I know it greatly grieves the heart of God that His leaders would act so much like the world. We are called to be set apart. We are called to set the example of what it means to love others the way Christ loved us! Unity in God's church seems like an impossible dream to me.

I often wonder if pastors only act this way in upstate NY. They're so competitive around here it borderlines ridiculous. I have tried repeatedly to work with other local pastors and repeatedly it seems to not work out, often because of this competitve spirit!

Sometimes it also seems like pastors and church leaders are the most judgmental people I know! They're judgmental of each other and they can't wait to point fingers, whisper behind backs and even do damage to other churches, all in the name of God? It bothers me and I think it should bother all of us because I know it bothers GOD!

How in the world are we ever going to build unity in our churches if we can't build love and unity with each other?

I am not satisified with the way things are now, and that's a good thing! I am pledging myself to work towards being a peace-maker and a unity builder in the Body of Christ. I KNOW this is what God wants! I KNOW this would bring Him incredible glory!

The question is, will you join me? Will you put your own feelings, agenda, judgments and opinions aside for the sake of building unity in the Body of Christ? It must begin with us!

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Church Planting Wisdom

Fri, 10 Jun 2011 00:29:00 GMT

Thought I'd share some of the top, most meaningful advice that I've received through the years about Church Planting:

1.) The surest way to fail is by trying to please everyone.

2.) Sometimes you have to let people that you love.... leave.

3.) The church is not a destination, but instead more like an airport that gets people from one place to another. (Alan Hirsch)

4.) Don't put people in leadership positions too quickly. (Everyone)

5.) Don't try to be like other churches or other pastors; be who God made YOU!

6.) The people who are suppose to stay will stay. (Mary Molino)

7.) Don't pull the trigger slowly. (Tony Liston)

8.) It seems people don't necesssarily remember what they are told of God's love, but they never forget what they have experienced of God's love. (Steve Sjogren)

9.) Just be a Shepherd and feed my sheep. (God)

10.) Be a purpose driven church (Rick Warren)

11.) What makes a leader a leader is leaders don't quit.

12.) Cry me a river, build me a bridge and get over it. (Glen Sartain)

13.) One wolf can take down a church of 200 people.

14.) Women can too preach! (Dan Southerland)

15.) Never forget who you work for! (Me)

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What Makes Someone a Pastor?

Mon, 16 May 2011 13:38:00 GMT

According to the Bible, what determines whether or not someone should be / is a pastor?

Is it education? College Degrees? Age? Meeting demoninational standards? Popularity? Experience? Gender? :-)

What determines whether or not someone should be a pastor, elder or spiritual leader in God's Church has everything to do with the calling, choosing and anointing of God Himself!

How did the mainstream church's thinking get so twisted in this country? How do people rationalize what the Bible says verses the way we've 'institutionalized' God's church?

Jesus called His disciples.(And He still does.) He 'called' ordinary, uneducated people. Their credentials weren't from some name-dropping institution. Their credentials were that they had a personal relationship with Jesus Christ. Their credentials were that they had been personally called and then trained by Jesus Himself.

I'm not anti-education by any means. But I do believe that there is an over-focus on formal education and degrees, and because of that, the Church in America has clouded and even ignored the most important biblical aspect about church leadership; the fact that the most important thing we should be looking for, encouraging and raising up are people who clearly have the calling of God right in our own local churches.

We should be looking around inside our churches and see who is already doing the work of a pastor (without the title). I never made the decision to be a pastor. It felt more like I just woke up one day and realized that was who God made me. Our job as the church is to to look for what God is doing in our midst. Only He can make someone a pastor or church leader. The church's job is to acknowledge, encourage and become an active part in HIS work!

I have seen too many people who have degrees and titles to be pastors, but not seen the calling or heart of a pastor evident in them. And I have also seen many people who I know are indeed pastors, but have never been acknowledged or encouraged in any way by the Church.

Our system is backwards to me. The Church should be the fertile ground for many pastors to be acknowledged and raised up! There are some churches that are doing an amazing job with this, Christian Community Church is one that comes to mind immediately. They are doing an awesome job of seeing the calling of God on individual lives and then giving them training and encouragement to do what God has called them to do!

I can't wait to see our church raise up more pastors! We have raised up one and have several more that we see God has in the making! It's exciting and I know, in time, God is going to make our church fertile ground for raising up MANY pastors!

I personally believe that (besides the obvious), one of the most important tests that any pastor should be required (by law?) to take is an emotional intelligence (EI) test. Because of the intensity of full time ministry, one has to be very emotionally stable. I've seen too many 'pastors' lose it because of the fact that they were not secure and stable in this area. The spiritual warfare is so incredibly intense at times and our emotional well-being will be sifted like sand.

Also, a pastor has too much power and influence in the lives of others and if he or she is not emotionally stable, well, disaster can and will follow!

And that brings me back to the calling of God. There's no way I could have survived in ministry this long if it wasn't for God's calling on my life. There is no doubt in my mind that with His calling, He gives that person supernatural power to sustain them.

It is His supernatural power that I depend on every day in order to do what I do. I couldn't survive a day without it and I know most pastors would agree.

I think it's time for the Church as a whole to get back to making God the focus of everything they do. There's too much focus on making 'leaders' and superstar pastors in this country. There needs to be more focus on the calling and power of God, and not making it all about how great the leader should be. When it comes to the church, it doesn't all rise and fall on leadership. It all rises and falls on God doing what God's going to do. He can use anyone He chooses to use. A lowly shepherd (David), a murderer (Moses), fisherman (Peter), or a woman He meets at a well, or even someone like me!

I write this to encourage those who know (on some level) that they are called by God but are continuing to allow the voice of the enemy to convince them that they are not worthy. I used to use that excuse for years with God. Then, one day, He simply said: "I know you are not worthy! It's not about you. It's about what I am going to do through you despite your flaws and shortcomings."

It’s hard to argue with that. In truth, it’s hard to argue with God at all for very long. :-) So what is God calling you to do friend? Is it all about you, or is it all about what He can do through you? Don’t let the voice of the enemy drown out the voice of God! Activate your faith by saying yes to the call He has placed on your life!

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Sun Stand Still?

Sat, 30 Apr 2011 21:44:00 GMT

My family gave me a Kindle a few weeks ago as a birthday present. I wasn't sure if I was going to like it at first, being that the writer in me LOVES holding books in my hands! But truth be told, I quickly learned to LOVE my Kindle!

I love the fact that I can instantly download any book! And it's so easy to be reading 5 or 6 books at one time without cluttering up much space. I've downloaded about 10 church leader type books in the last few weeks and I'm absolutely thrilled to be absorbing so much great information.

My absolute favorite book so far is a book called "Sun Stand Still" by Steven Furtick. (Subtitle: What happens when you dare to ask God for the impossible.)

All I can say is, WOW, what an amazing book! It's a wonderful reminder of what it means to have a HUGE, God-sized faith and vision for what God can do with any of us, if we'll just believe God to do the impossible.

It makes me realize that I have drifted a bit from having giant, God-sized visions for the future. Don't get me wrong, I have continued to have really big hopes, dreams and expectations for all that God will do in my life and ministry in the future. He has already knocked my socks off more times than I can count.

But still, this book makes me realize that I've been allowing my dreams to shrink a bit lately. I've been getting comfortable. I've gotten way too okay with how things are in the present and I really have scaled back on how big I've dared to dream and reach up for the Kingdom of God. Time to change all that! Time to begin a page 23 vision! (You have to read the book to understand what that means!)

Time to start praying some "Sun standing still" kind of prayers. I feel God urging me to dream really, really big once again! We know He loves it when we ask Him for the impossible because that prayer will definitely require faith. I know I have my part to do and I must stretch myself greater than I ever have before, but I think I'm ready. I have been holding back. I see that now. I want to give Him everything I have, no regrets!

It's so exciting! I already feel something BIG is on it's way! I don't know what but I do know WHO is bringing it!

Easter Sunday was so totally amazing! There are no words to describe what I felt on Sunday. Only that God was as visible as I have ever seen Him, (and that's really visible). I had a bigger glimpse of Him than I've ever seen before. The feeling has continued to stay with me all week. I never want it to leave but I know I can't stay on the mountain top in this world for long. Time to roll up my sleeves and go back to the valley once again.

Reminds me of a song that spoke volumes to me right before I started BHCC. It was a song that expressed how I felt as I was leaving my last ministry position at my other church, a song about accepting how God moves us from place to place: Painting Pictures of Egypt

Here's a picture from last Sunday's Easter worship at BHCC:

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Judgment Begins with the House of God!

Thu, 31 Mar 2011 12:12:00 GMT

I recently listened to a webinar where yet another senior pastor from a growing mega-church (down south) describes the 'magic formula' he used to make his church a huge success.

There are tons of church leadership books, conferences and seminars out there where these pastors and churches are lifted up like rock stars and they can't wait to tell all of us how to build a megachurch just like them. The implied message from them is that if we too will simply apply their strategies and magic formula on how to build a church, we too can have a megachurch and be a rock star pastor, as if that's what we're all striving to be.

There's so much wrong with the message they are sending out to pastors and church planters in America. We have let the corporate America thinking penetrate the Church at large and it's so not what God has called the church to be. I just wish it hadn't taken me so long to figure out because it has corrupted my thinking for too many years.

Way too many church planters go into church planting with totally unreasonable expectations. Because all we tend to hear are the stories of churches that have explosive growth from the beginning, we can become convinced that every church should be like that or the senior pastor and church is a failure. (Everything rises and falls on leadership we're taught.)

The churches that explode and have rapid growth are almost always churches located in densely populated places like the Bible-belt, Florida, Texas and California. You almost never hear of rapidly growing mega-type churches in the Northeast for instance. What does that tell us?

And there is absolutely no way I believe those kind of churches are seeing that kind of rapid growth due to reaching unchurched and lost people. I've been doing this way too long and I know it takes tremendous amounts of effort, resources and time to reach totally unchurched people. No, I think the rapid growth is often more likely due to Christians doing the church hopping thing. (Okay, I'm not saying all the growth comes from it, but come on, a good portion does!)

It bothers me that very few people and pastors are being sincere in talking about this because I have to believe they are aware of it.

We have a quickly growing church in our area and I know that many local churches have been left almost crippled because they have lost so many of their people who have hopped churches in search of the next exciting thing. This is not true church growth. This is not conversion growth. This is sheep-swapping.

One of the best and only reliable church plant studies I've seen done was by Ed Stetzer. They studied over 1000 church plants and here is a graph of how the average church plant grew over a four year period:

And again, this is the average church. Some obviously grow faster and some grow slower but much has to do with what part of the country they are located as well.

I wish I would have had this information before I started our church and I wish more conferences and pastors would talk and teach about this in healthy ways! But instead, all these conferences seem more focused on teaching and convincing pastors that they too can be rock star pastors and build megachurches! And the underlying message to them is that they are a failure if they are not leading a huge church. This is so wrong!

I am convinced that it is always been God's plan that the average church in America is around 74 people. I think God is the author of this for good reason.

I am not at all against mega churches in any way, shape or form. I think they have their place and God is in those churches too. Every healthy church should absolutely be growing! But at what rate it grows is up to God and not all about how great the senior leader is or isn't! It has to do with location, location, location! It has to do with many, many various factors.

What I am weary of and believe totally grieves the heart of God is the focus being so much on the senior leaders and the magic formulas AND judging churches and leaders by the SIZE of their church.

Pastors are as guilty if not more guilty of this than anyone. I've been to local senior pastor gatherings where all the pastors of the big churches sit together and rarely talk with anyone else. When I meet another pastor, the first thing they almost always ask is: "How many people do you have?" It's crazy if you think about it! It's wrong and I pray God will use me as a voice to encourage CHANGE!

I know how this affects pastors of smaller churches because I've seen and heard their discouragement. And I too felt discouraged early on when the church growth felt slower than what I thought it would be.

But looking at this study done by Ed Stetzer (and Lifeway?), I realize that we are very much an average church! In fact, we're actually a bit above the curve and that is absolutely awesome considering the part of the country we are in AND the fact that we have a female senior leader. :-)

Why do we humans always want to compare ourselves anyway? Isn't the goal for God to get all the glory? Christians and especially pastors should know better! If we take the glory for what God is doing, then we've wasted our lives.

Fellow pastors, do not compare yourself with anyone else! It's a waste of time and energy. Do not use the success standards of the world to measure your success in the Kingdom of God. Only God can judge each one of us for our faithfulness to do what He's called us to do.

80% or more of the people who come to BHCC come from totally unchurched backgrounds. That is incredibly exciting to me that God would trust us so much to bring these precious lambs of His to our church!

What has always surprised (and frustrated me a bit) is that more 'mature' followers of Christ haven't come to work in the field God is planting here. It's the perfect ground to plant, water and serve for a devoted follower of Christ. I believe mature followers should be choosing a church based on finding a place they can best serve the Lord and use their spiritual gifts to the best possible yield.

I pray that more mega-church leaders would humble themselves and send messages of help and encouragement to pastors who continue to labor in smaller fields. It baffles me that the larger churches don't help the smaller ones. It makes no sense according to God's blueprints. (I can't even get them to talk to me half the time. LOL!)

Judgment begins with the House of God.

1 Peter 4:17
"For it is time for judgment to begin with God’s household; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God?"

Peace Out! :-)

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Confessions of a Senior Pastor

Mon, 21 Mar 2011 14:35:00 GMT

There are so many different parts and roles of being a pastor. I (in the flesh) would never, ever have chosen this life or this role in life for myself. It's hard, even impossible most of the time (without the power of God).

Senior pastors today are expected to be great leaders, shepherds, care-takers, preachers, technology experts, teachers, developers of leaders, savvy business leaders, financial experts, administrative gurus, biblical scholars, writers, evangelists, visionaries, vision casters, recruiters, and on and on it goes.

I would not do this if I was not totally compelled by God and completely convinced that this is what He has called me to do!

Yes, there are many parts of being a pastor that I truly love and absolutely enjoy doing! But there are other parts about being a pastor that I totally dislike and so wish I could get out of doing.

My natural earthly personality is to be a people-pleaser. I love to make people happy. I love to be an encourager and to make people smile and feel good. I often call myself a recovering co-dependent because that is what I am.

It bothers me a lot when people get mad at me or don't like me. I (foolishly) want everyone to like me. I love people and I like being liked. What can I say? We all need to be self-aware of our weaknesses as well as our strengths. This is my tendency, but this is not who I am when i am being led by the Holy Spirit (which is my constant goal).

So one of the hardest things for me about being a pastor has to do with speaking truth in love to people that they do not want to hear. I do not like strong confrontation to the degree that it can make me feel literally physically ill at times. But on the positive side for me, I have great courage and with the help of the Holy Spirit, will usually confront when I know that is what God's calling me to do. (I guess that's more to His credit than mine though.

I never feel good after preaching messages that are convicting and since about 50% or more of my messages that God gives me to preach would be considered that, well, you get the picture.

One of my weaknesses has everything to do with communicating expectations to people and then holding them accountable. I'm horrible at that but I'm trying very hard to get better at it because I can see that I'm not helping people when I don't (even gently) hold them accountable.

Because I care about people, I am very concerned about where they will spend their eternal destinies. There are so many 'good' people who think they are Christians but are not following Christ. For example, sooo many couples these days are living together and are not married. According to the bible, this is living in sin. Living in sin is rebellion against God. If they do not repent (change and submit to God's laws), and die while they are living in sin, according to the Bible, their soul will go to hell. Because I believe in the bible, I believe that's true and that deeply concerns me for these individuals.

Unfortunately, couples who are living together do not want to hear that and when you tell them that, and they will become very angry at anyone who tells them different. The problem is really about the fact that people today want to do what they want to do and they don't want to submit to any other authority other than their own. It makes them angry when you even suggest it. People want to make up their own rules and ultimately, be their own God. This is exactly like the original rebellion against God from the beginning of time. It begins in Genesis. Adam and Eve didn't believe God and wanted to do what they wanted to do and had to live with the consequences of that.

Well anyway, that's the example of what is the hardest, most challenging aspect for me as a pastor. I realize that some pastors might say that it's very shallow of me to feel that way and I agree, it is! But I think transparency is a very positive thing for a pastor to have so I'm willing to strive to stay that way.

The other hardest part for me is the fact that so many "Christians" seem to have such a casual and uncaring attitude towards God's church. This breaks my heart (& I know it breaks the heart of God) and honestly, it makes me mad at the same time. The church seems to be a low priority on so many people's lists in America today and because of that reason, the church in America is dying. If people claim to love God, I cannot understand how they can rationalize NOT loving His church and making it a high priority in their lives.

The Church is God's family. It's the living, breathing, Body of Christ and I can not understand how something so precious and holy and beautiful could be treated so casually and with such lack of concern, neglect and care!!! And then I remember, that is exactly the same way that Christ was and is treated. Like the worship song says, "Like a rose, trampled on the ground..." It breaks my heart but that same passion is what drives me to keep going every day.

Other pastors who are reading this, what's the hardest part about being a pastor for you? Or how about for any of you Followers of Christ? It's not only a pastor's job to speak truth in love and follow Christ. Here's your chance to confess. Write a comment and tell us how we can pray for you.

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